What if...

When I worked at Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn, the best job ever, (aka Camp Tough Crowd), my co-workers and I would spend a disproportionate amount of time joking to actually working. (someone remind me to take this down when I start looking for jobs again.) One such time at Camp Tough Crowd, a few of us came up with the brilliant idea to create an "angry game show." It would basically consist of the host asking questions in the manner of, for example, "What the hell is the fucking capital of Estonia?" and "Who was the first goddamn African American to win an Academy Award?" Basically the format would include a lot of swearing. Anyway, we thought it was a brilliant, hilarious idea and we were about to have a hit show on our hands, until we told Ken Ober, a producer on TC and former host of MTV's "Remote Control," about it, who responded with something like "Uh, yeah, morons. Great idea. Except you might remember a little show in the 80's with the same premise called 'Remote Control.'" After which he called out, "Hey, Colin [former sidekick on 'Remote Control'], this bunch of idiots came up with the 'brilliant' idea for an angry game show." Colin: "What? Remote Control? You guys are idiots." Idiots? Maybe. Highly amused for the afternoon? Definitely.

Why am I telling this story? Because I was sitting in Biostats the other day, getting frustrated over some problem, and thinking about how badly I wanted to raise my hand and ask a question angry-game-show-style. "Excuse, me, but how the fuck did you get 0.87 as the goddamn standard error?!?" Or, "Uh, yeah, I'm confused... Why the hell do we fucking reject the motherfucking null here?!?" I was so tempted to ask a question in that manner, but then I remembered that a) there are 400 people in my class and I might embarrass myself, b) I don't want to fail based on my choice of words, and c) maybe there is some standard of decorum that I should be following(?). Anyway, the scenario made me laugh to myself and reminded me of working for a comedy show. Then, my mind wandered to "Hmm... I kind of miss working in comedy. That was probably the most fun I'll ever have at a job. Plus, I was concerned with biostats zero times when I worked in comedy." And then I completely forgot what I was confused about in Biostats. Ahh, ignorance was bliss. Now ignorance is driving me crazy as I have a fucking Biostats final in two days.

I'll take "For the love of all that's fucking holy, why in god's motherfucking name am I taking this class?" for $200 dollars, please.